The Rabbit

I had a lot of fun with this VN!  I couldn't help but feel bad for poor Alice; I've certainly dealt with similar struggles in the past against anxiety and a lack of self-confidence (and having people take advantage of me because of them), so I feel her pain.  Moreover, I have to say I'm quite impressed by how much you've improved as a writer and an artist since your Menhera VN Jam submission!  Kudos to you, heheheh~

But you know what I really want to see?  More.

More scenes of Alice's internal turmoil and attempts to regain some semblance of control as Cinnamon pushes her further and further, of Paprika wavering between keeping her distance or helping her clearly struggling friend, and of what becomes of these ill-starred girls as they grow ever more entangled together!  Will Alice's last words prove prophetic, or will Cinnamon soften up with time—or will Paprika suddenly snap?  Why leave it a mystery when you can show us, and drag us through the mud and misery alongside them~?

And not to mention more small moments like Alice in her room before the confrontation; even that short scene worked wonders to flesh her out!  You've got some interesting characters here, and I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say I want to see more of them struggling and fighting and growing as they bounce off of and butt heads with each other, heheh.

I'd also love to see more of your art!  You did such a great job with the CGs and portraits (and that charming background you made~) that I'm certain your VN would be all the stronger with more like them, you know?  Not to mention adding more music and sound effects; the way you cut from the background chattering to complete silence during the confrontation scene shows you know how much of a difference sound design can make with presentation, so why not take it even further~?

In short, don't be afraid to take advantage of the full duration of these jams, or to go all out with your work!  I'll definitely be looking forward to your future VNs, heheheh~

This was a bit difficult for me to get into since I didn't know the characters or what their deal was, but it still did a pretty good job of establishing a mood. My rating would've been 3/5, but I'm holding off on putting that in because I have a feeling it would have impacted differently if I'd read the other work it's related to, and I don't want to rate it unfairly.

im totally delusional saying this but i think they can make it work ahaha

this was cute, we liked the bunny :)
- pukebucket